


What Happens in a Loo, Stays in a Loo

by gala_apples



Category: Skins (UK)
Genre: F/M, M/M, Masturbation, Questioning, Voyeurism
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-12-11
Updated: 2011-12-11
Packaged: 2017-10-27 04:42:38
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,161
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/291737
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gala_apples/pseuds/gala_apples
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After Sid is utterly traumatised, Tony tries to help him out. Set pre 106(Russia)</p>
            </blockquote>





	What Happens in a Loo, Stays in a Loo

Sid's hands smell like cunt. He's sitting in math class, trying to not think about what just happened in the loo, and the lesson sure as hell isn't distracting him well enough, and he went to prop up his head with his hand for just a minute and his hand smells like cunt and he thinks he's going to vomit.

He puts his arm flat on the table, palm flat, fingers splayed. It rests there for all of five seconds before he's raising it again and sniffing. Because it's not bad enough to throw himself off a bridge once, he's got to do it a dozen times. It still smells wrong.

He can't remember what year people switched over from raising hands and asking to go to the bathroom, and needing a special hall pass, to just slipping out as quietly as possible. He wants to remember, wants to think about trivial shit so he doesn't have to worry about it.

Ostensibly the plan was just to use the gross, honey perfumed soap to scrub with until his hands bled, but before he knows it, he's standing outside Tony's class. It feels right, Tony's always the one he brings his problems too. The thing is, he's really committed to making a scene if he opens the door. In the end there's no question, he puts his hand on the knob and twists. He needs to hear Tony's voice, even if Tony only calls him an idiot that's comforting because it's normal.

"What can I do for you, Mr Jenkins." He's not surprised at the snotty tone. Most teachers don't notice him, they expend their energy on students that need it, deserve it. But once in awhile he'll get a teacher that really hates him for being so mediocre. It's the 'I see a bit of myself in you' syndrome, and Sid hates it.

"I need Tony." And wow, he didn't mean for that to come out so baldfaced and needy, but there it is.

And apparently Mr Stevens doesn't give a toss about need, as he replies "as you can see, we're in the middle of a lesson."

"Yeah, but-" He's got nothing planned out, but whatever he says won't be good. He knows that much.

Luckily Tony saves him. Like always. He raises his hand and says "I have to piss" and just stands and walks out without giving a Stevens a chance to say anything. Sid is left standing at the head of the class for a moment before following. They go to the bathroom, a totally logical choice for private conversations. The minute they're through the door Sid's stomach lurches at the associated memories. It isn't good. What if he can't piss for the next year and a half because he's traumatized?

"Tony I think I'm asexual."

"What?" Sid had thought he might shock Tony. Tony wasn't the sort of person that understood not using every whiff of lust to its best advantage. But his declaration gets a single word, and a toneless, apathetic one at that. It's almost offensive, except Sid's learned too much to ever be truly hurt by his best mate.

"I don't like sex."

"Oh, really?" Like Sid saying he doesn't plan to ever get laid is just as common as buying a half-pint of milk in the cafeteria.

"My hands smell like vag and I want to vomit."

Finally, a real emotion. Even if it is just curiosity, it's better than nothing. "Why do your hands smell like fanny?"

"I don't want to talk about it."

"You've tried washing your hands?"

"That's not the point Tony!" Fucking hell, since when was his best mate such a bloody idiot?

"So you're not freaking out because you smell like pussy. You're freaking out because you smell like pussy and you don't like it." Tony waves his arm about in a way that Sid thinks is supposed to mean something. "That's fine. Some girls smell really bad."

Sid shakes his head miserably. He's heard all the dirty cafeteria talk, and it's not like that. "It wasn't like you hear, fish or tuna or pickle. It was almost sweet. It was just really wrong."

"Well, what do you want a girl to taste like?" They've segued into a different sense, like Tony actually saw Brooke shoving her wet fingers in Sid's mouth rather than just heard a vague less-than-story about it. It's sort of infuriating that Tony just knows _everything_ , without ever having to struggle.

"How the fuck should I know?" It comes out a lot harsher than any conversation he's had with Tony before. It's just very fucking stressful. Getting to finger a hot girl in a loo should have been the best experience of his life to date. Not knowing why it was the utter opposite is making him rigid and tense.

"You ever consider tasting guys?"

"What the fuck, Tony?"

"It's less sweet. You might like it better." Sid doesn't know what's worse, that Tony somehow knows what blokes taste like, or that a single fucked up encounter with a girl is enough to make everyone think he's queer.

Sid doesn't say anything, just drops his face into his hands. They still reek, it's still freaking him out but it's better than Tony seeing him blush. He is prepared to keep his face covered until Tony gets exasperated and leaves. He reckons it'll be soon, Tony doesn't have much patience, at least not when it comes to him. A minute later though Tony is shoving his hand into his face, cupping his nose. It smells funny and Sid drops his hands in time to see Tony cram his hand back down his jeans.

"I'm going to get off and you're going to smell me and tell me if you like it better." It's bold but casual, the way Tony always acts. He's wanking off in front of Sid, and he's acting like it's the most normal thing possible. _This_ is why he comes to Tony when he's got a problem.

Tony's not a noisy wanker, nor does he obviously try to hold his noises back. He's just jerking his arm, the occasional grunt popping from his mouth. At one point he stops and unzips, pulls down his jeans and pants and hobbles over to the sink. After that it's a matter of a minute before he comes into the sink. Sid watches the spunk slowly drip through the tiny holes in the drain so he doesn't have to look at Tony's face.

And then there's a hand on the lower half of his face. Tony's hand smells sweaty, musky and vaguely sour. It's a far better thing.

"Right. Gay then," he stammers out.

"'Sall right, Sid. I'll tell Maxxie later, he'll give you pointers." Tony is smiling, and Sid is hard, and he's seen two different people get off in a loo today. He'll definitely never be able to use a school loo again.  



End file.
